Sunday, April 11, 2010

Food for thought

I don't really know if I understand that phrase, "food for thought..." What I am about to tell you is supposed to feed your thinking? Hmmm.. I'm not confident about that phrase nor if what I am about to tell you will feed your thinking by any means.

Maybe I'm just unintelligent.

Anyways, I have some things going on in my mind that I feel like I need to have down on "paper" a.k.a blogspot.

I am an introvert?
I am a self-proclaimed introvert and tested as 100% introverted. I don't enjoy being around more than 5 people at a time. Going to social events makes me nervous and stresses me out, especially if a majority of the people there are people that I have never met (or even worse, have met once or twice and so I feel like I should engage in conversation with him/her but have nothing to say). I like to be in bed by 10:00 so I always turn invitations to go out with friends down when it's "late" because I'd rather chill on the couch or sleep. Introvert.
However, PJ just left to go to work and so it's just Romo and me. Don't get me wrong, Romo is quite enough to keep me occupied, but I feel lonely. I wonder who is working and as it turns out, all of the whopping 3 people I would call in this moment are indeed at work. But I would really love some company. Maybe just one person. We could go for a walk at the park. That would be ideal. But alas, here I am blogging and the only excitement ahead is stopping by Walmart after buying groceries for some windshield wiper fluid. What a night!

"If someone asked you what the greatest good on this earth is, what would you say?"
I've been reading a book by Francis Chan entitled Crazy Love. The above quote is in chapter 3, which I just finished reading. I would say God is the greatest good because I know that is the right answer. But I question whether or not I actually believe this because my life doesn't show it. I know that I believe it - but wouldn't my life look radically different from the world if that were true? I'm not so radical. So... do I really believe it? Or do I just know it? My prayer is that I would know and believe that God is the greatest good on this earth because I have personally experienced his loving goodness. That's scary to write, think, and definitely to pray. God brings us closer to him through suffering. (Not to say that God always gives suffering in order to draw us closer, but through our suffering which he allows to happen, we often find ourselves in intimacy with our maker for lack of anything else that compares.) So, that's a hard prayer to pray because no one wants suffering, but that very well could be the answer to my prayer. Whatever it takes to understand God's greatness is what I should want, but my flesh is very afraid.

"Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him."
(Please do not misunderstand me. I am not anticipating suffering now because of what I am thinking. Thinking is all that I am doing.)
Now to groceries and that windshield wiper fluid. Or is it windshield washer fluid? Regardless - extremely eventful next few hours, eh?
Mrs. Scalf

No comments:

Post a Comment